Dear Tiny,

I just arrived here at Kemptville yesterday! This place is really awesome. I have met some wonderful people but my roommate drives me nuts. Last night while I was trying to sleep, my roommate kept having visitors and being really loud. When I asked them to take the party elsewhere she said that I should quit being a bag. I know that she is just trying to have fun and meet as many people as she can but I think that she should be a little more considerate of my needs as well. Also last night they spilled juice all over my clothes! What am I going to do!!!! I need some sleep!

 

Please Help - Sticky and Tired

 

Dear S& T,

 

Whenever I have a problem with someone I remember something that my good friends at the Students Commission taught me - The Four Pillars: Respect, Listen, Understand and Communicate. When you respect someone you are better able to listen to them. When you sincerely listen you can fully understand what someone is trying to say to you. And only when understanding occurs are you truly able to communicate. It might be a good idea to sit down with your roommate, explain the Four Pillars and then see if the two of you can reach an agreement. It is wonderful that you are able to have a good time while you are here and meet many people.

 

Cheers,

-Tiny

 

Dear Tiny,

I really enjoy my group and the discussion is really intense! I feel really close to the rest of my group and we have really been sharing personal stories. Yesterday during our breakout session someone made a comment that reminded me of something that I am really struggling with. I suddenly broke into tears and had to rush out of the room so that I could calm down. I feel really bad and many members of my group have come to ask me if I am ok. I feel really bad about how I acted, what should I do?

-Upset and Frustrated

 

Dear Upset and Frustrated,

What happened to you is not at all uncommon and I would say that all of us are feeling triggered on some level. When you speak about issues that are personal and close to home it is only natural that you are feeling a little sensitive. Next time you are triggered by something that comes up in your group I suggest that you deal with this in a way that works for you. Perhaps talk with someone that you are close with, go for a walk (on campus), or take a warm shower. It seems that your group is really caring and that they are really concerned for you. Explain to them what happened and continue on from there. Also, remember that you can talk to your facilitator about finding someone to talk to here as well. Peace and love.

-Tiny

 

Dear Tiny,

I met someone here that I really care about. I think that she could be the one Tiny! I know that I have only known her for a week but I can't stop thinking about her. I don't know if it is possible to have a long distance relationship with her but I think that I would like to try. When I asked her about what she thought about this, she said that she felt the same way. Could this be love Tiny? When I told my friend about it he said that I was crazy. I don't know what to do?

Sick with Love

 

Dear Sick with Love,

When you spend a lot of time sharing information with new people relationships can develop on the fly. What you are feeling could be only physical. During the first phase of a relationship people are often so infatuated with each other that they really don't notice anything else about their partner. I really think that you should wait until after you go home. See what you both develop by being far apart. Keep in touch through the phone or e-mail or whatever. What you found , could be what you are looking for, yet could just become a lifelong friend. Only time will tell.

-Tiny

 

Dear Tiny,

This is my second day of Kemptville 2002, and things are going really well. My group has really come together and I made some new friends in the evening workshops yesterday. I know that we have just arrived but I am really homesick, I haven't ever been away from my family for more than one night. I told this to my friend but he just laughed and said, 'In the morning you'll feel better' because Kemptville is the best conference in Canada. I know that I shouldn't feel this way, and if the guys ever find out I would never hear the end of it. What should I do Tiny?

 

Sad and Scared

 

I must say that I feel for you. Although you are having fun, you really miss the people back home. Perhaps you should call them and let them know how you feel? I know that they would probably tell you that everything is fine and that you should just try to enjoy your self. Don't worry about the guys, if they give you a hard time just explain your situation and then invite them to go to one of the young men's guide discussion groups which meets every night at the W.B. George at 8 :30 PM. I hope that this can help you with your problem, have fun at the rest of the conference!

 

-Tiny

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